It’s hard to imagine making memories without thinking about someone there. When we see something funny we have to call our friend or sibling to watch it. So it’s no wonder when we think about the past like high school or college we reminisce on the times we spent with our friends. Where are they now?
Some are lucky enough to hold on to them but some of us ran into some unexpected solitude.
People change. Especially trying to hold on to that high school friend. Life humbles us all and after high school, I seen a lot of humbled people. Those who weren’t either was strung out on drugs or still pretty. The latter are the first friends a person will lose. At least for me, I didn’t fit in either category. I’m not pretty nor do I do drugs. The next are the career people. All I can do is sit back and clap at their success.
If anyone is like me and is approaching 30 without a family then friends seem bigger than others. If a relationship is a full-time job then having that person live with in the same place must be overtime. If they have kids that’s a grave shift, lets not forget the likely work a full time job for money. If they stopped hitting me up after a relationship just toss that friendship in the trash can, it’s over. Some will drop all their friends the second they find a lover. A word of advice don’t be caught dead waiting when that person is single again.
Marriage is understandable, if I wasn’t invited to be the best man then I know I won’t hear from that person ever again unless they come to pitch me some pyramid scheme.
In this new day and age if anyone wants new friends they better bring something to the table. Sadly enough, a good conversation will only get a person to the door and no further. It’s hard to justify a new face in a life when someone is struggling to maintain. It’s just too much of a hassle to go out and meet a new “friend” unless both love to party or share the same hobby. If someone has a lot of money, it’s best to at least match that income and free time or be prepared to be looked down upon and left behind.
I seen this time and time again, after I am no longer useful get ready to be cut off. Even if there wasn’t a falling out. In networking, there is no loyalty no unconditional anything. More times than not, the cutting off will be from people who isn’t doing anything either but currently feeling higher than they are. Don’t be waiting when they come back down to earth.
I don’t normally lose friends. When I do it is pointless trying to rebuild. The whole friendship is poison from that point on. It’s generally not a good idea to wait after being left in most situations.
How did it come to this?
It’s easy for a person to wake up to little or no friends. If a person had many friends chances are one couldn’t spend the necessary time to make all of their Myspace Top 8. As an adult many will be cut down to the core group. Then some have a family, move away, change or lose their mind.
Some break the mold and keep much of their friends. It’s a great thing. Some are adapted to the life of few or no friends that is also great. I just thought I remind people that they are alone it may not be because they are a terrible person. These seem obvious but not so obvious when a person is in the depth of depression.
This isn’t a we all care post or we care because they likely don’t but at least we know it’s not because of the person left behind…usually.